Alright folks, let me walk you through whipping up some dang easy ground moose dishes tonight. Had this frozen moose burger from last fall’s hunt thawing in my sink since noon – time to make magic.
Gathering the Mess
First off, dug around the fridge like a raccoon in a dumpster. Found half an onion starting to grow fuzz – scraped that off real good. Grabbed a wrinkly bell pepper, couple potatoes going soft, and some garlic cloves shriveled up in the corner. Perfect. Oh, and snagged that giant jar of pre-mixed taco seasoning from the back of the cupboard – expiry date was last month but smelled fine.
Chopping Chaos
Slammed that onion and pepper onto the cutting board. Knife was kinda dull so ended up hacking them into uneven chunks. Sliced potatoes real thin like I saw on TikTok once – half came out thicker than my thumb. Didn’t even bother peeling the garlic, just smashed ’em with a can of beans. Pieces went flying but the dog took care of that.
Meat Showdown
That moose meat was colder than my ex’s heart. Dumped the pink brick into my rustiest skillet on medium-high. Started breaking it up with a wooden spoon – thing kept splintering but whatever. Fried it till the juices ran clear and all them little bits started getting crispy edges. Sprinkled three heaping spoonfuls of that questionable taco dust over it. Stirred like crazy while coughing from the pepper cloud.
Throwing It Together
Tossed all my raggedy veggies into another pan with some olive oil that might’ve been rancid. Cooked till the onions went see-through and potatoes got some brown spots. Mixed everything into one glorious greasy mountain. Let it bubble for 5 minutes while I washed the spoon under cold water – melted a bit but still usable.
Feeding the Wolves
Plopped the whole mess in my biggest chipped bowl. Kids came running like I rang a dinner bell. Didn’t even bother with plates – just handed out forks. Here’s the miracle part:
- Kid #1 shoveled it down claiming it tasted “better than Mcdonalds”
- Kid #2 picked out peppers but ate TWO helpings
- The dog stood under the table catching falling bits like a pro
- My wife just kept asking whose recipe this was
Cleaned up with paper towels cause all the dishrags were moldy. Took me 25 minutes from freezer to face-stuffing. Moral of the story? Moose meat forgives all sins. Use up whatever’s rotting in your kitchen – slap some sketchy seasoning on it – call it dinner. Everybody wins.
